Let me first begin by apologizing to all the people who have switched to the Nikon D700 in the last few years because of my recommendations. Really, honestly, I sincerely apologize. I truly feel bad about this, because you guys are fucked now.
WHAT was Nikon thinking?? Jesus Christ. What kind of an upgrade is this? Is this really supposed to be an upgrade to the D700?? It’s gotta be, because apparently the D700 is now discontinued. Was Nikon even paying attention to what I was writing about on my blog and all the complaints we were getting here at Canon about the megapixels? Did they fucking consult with The Lord of Speedlights about this? Didn’t Nikon get the megapixel memo??
You know, just because you CAN doesn’t always mean that you SHOULD. Nikon had the opportunity to include this 37MP Sony sensor in the D800, and they did, but this is the worst decision they could have taken.
I feel for you Nikon morons who are now going to have to suddenly deal with 37MP files, up from 12MP on the D700. Imagine what that will do to your workflow having to deal with 37MP of bloated files. Processing power, RAM and especially storage are going to take a serious hit. And I’ve seen the files, they’re softer than a baby’s butt. Where the fuck is all the detail??? My God. And the noise, oh god, the noise.
Say hello to the melted eyebrow! That is some incredible detail right there, wouldn’t you say? I mean, you can see every individual hair in the eyebrow down to each individual cell in each hair! This is what 37MP is for right? This is absolutely stunning resolution! This image reminds me of the melted hay image on the EOS 7D from a while back. But this is far worse than that. At least we were still able to see some individual strands of hay in the melted heap. This is one big mushy blob of eyebrow hair. Does that even look like hair to you?
Look at the color banding and the noise in the shadows in this ISO 100 (!!!!!) image. Awesome isn’t it? And to think that this is a JPEG with noise reduction applied. How bad was it before that??
Why does this ISO 320 image look like it was shot at ISO 3200?? How bad was this before the noise reduction??
And you’ll be able to get all this stunning 37MP of fine detail at an incredible, blazingly fast, photon freezing 4 FPS in FX mode (6 FPS in DX mode with Battery pack!)!!Really?? 4 FPS??????
Down from 8 FPS in FX mode on the D700. Oh. My. God. So if you were used to the 8 FPS on your D700 you’re going to really, seriously, have to slow down now. Not only are you slowing down in the field, but because of the fucking bloated, razor sharp, 37MP files you’re slowing down in post too. Oh God, what happened at Nikon? Jesus Christ, I can’t believe this. FUCK!
I’m laughing my ass off and crying at the same time. Laughing because we’re going to fucking own this piece of shit camera in a few days, but crying because I feel so sorry, oh so sorry for all you Nikon morons and especially those who switched from Canon to the D700. Oh God I’m so sorry.
How do you “upgrade” from the D700 to this?? It’s a fucking downgrade! Does Nikon expect the D700 ($2700) crowd to upgrade to the D4 ($6000)??? HAHAHAHA you Nikon morons are SO fucked. The only upgrades I can think of on the D800 are the new autofocus system and the video capabilities. But with this noisy sensor, don’t expect a lot from the image quality and noise. But hey, you’ll have a headphone jack! So maybe it’s not so bad after all right???
Excuse me now while I uncork a bottle of champagne and join the party here in the cafeteria at Canon USA.